Cameron Diaz is starring in a new movie out this week called Bad Teacher from Columbia (Sony) Pictures. The cast is pretty jam packed with stars Justin Timberlake, Jason Siegel, and Phyllis Smith from the Office. Not to mention John Michael Higgins, who is one of the funniest actors alive and makes everything that he is in that much funnier.
Anyway, I’ve been seeing the trailers on television which portray Diaz’s character as a pot smoking, delinquent teacher, who couldn’t care less about the welfare or education of her kids. Checkout the Bad Teacher Movie trailer below.
While I never saw any of my teachers smoking out their car in the parking lot during lunch, I couldn’t help but think about some of the bad teachers I’ve had in the past. I’m reminded of “Sweetchuck” my 7th grade math teacher. I don’t remember his real name, but we called him Sweetchuck because he looked exactly like that character from the Police Academy Movies.
He wore a bow tie with his cheap tweed suit and since he was allergic to chalk he has to use an overhead projector to teach. If you were one minute late to class he would lock the door and you couldn’t get in. He gave a verbal quiz at the end of every class, and had no problem berating kids if they missed a question. He was such a dick. Who gives verbal math quizzes, seriously?
I remember the first day of class he told us how allergic he was and mentioned that if he were to have a reaction during class to remain calm and that the nurse would come when he pressed a panic button that was installed in his room special, just for him.
I was a nerd in school, so the last thing that crossed my mind was how to develop a way to make him sniff chalk so we could skip class. However, there were a few students who were thinking exactly that, and it wasn’t long before they brought their plan to fruition.
One day before class a few kids snuck into the room and used the chalk to write all over the chalk board. I mean they covered it with fake math equations, pictures, scribbles, anything that would take up space. When Sweetchuck came in he went ballistic. I don’t know why he didn’t just leave the chalk up there, he never used the board, but for some reason he decided to wipe it away with the dry eraser. Bad move Sweetchuck.
Dust from the chalk went all over the place and it wasn’t long before Sweetchuck was huffing and puffing and turning red. Everyone laughed, that is until Sweetchuck just closed his eyes and passed out. His little four foot tall stick figure body fell straight to the ground with a heavy thud. The students responsible were the first ones to leave. I think they left skid marks as they bolted out the door. A few of us stuck around to find this “panic” button Sweetchuck warned us about. I guess that was a myth because we never could locate it.
A few minutes later the nurse arrived with the wrestling/gym coach. They gave him some smelling salts and he popped to. It was like watching John Goodman standing over the geeks in Revenge of the Nerds. At that point, only about half the class had stuck around, but Sweetchuck just dusted himself off, caught his breath, and went back to the overhead projector, and kept right on teaching. Math was just never the same after Sweetchuck.
If you’re still kicking, this post is dedicated to you Mr. Sweetchuck. My favorite Bad Teacher!